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Offender :
You!
Date: Saturday, September 28, 2002
Offense #15240095: Sitting in front of the computer FAR TOO LONG!
Details of Offense:
During our routine check of the Internet, we, the Internet Police, have
discovered that you have been on your chair in front of the computer for
WAY TOO LONG!

You are hereby ORDERED
to clean up that pile of cups, cans, wrappers and papers on your desk (yes,
we can see you - sit up straight!) and after you have logged into the real
world for a minimum of an hour, you may log back on to the Internet.
Failure to comply may result in loss of reality, carpal tunnel syndrome,
and the requirement of a larger chair. The timer starts NOW! Get off your
butt - you'll thank us for it later.
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