Last week I reminded you that today is Father's Day and that you should do something nice for your dad.  Well I would like to share with you a little something that I prepared for my Pop!

Please click on this link.  My Pop

Now go give your Pop, Dad, Father a big hug and let him know you care!

Rabbit's Motto: "Lettuce Prey."

All I wanted to have breakfast in bed on Father's Day. Just once that's all I asked So, my kids put a cot in the kitchen!

The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland

Seeing the Doctor

"My stomach has been bothering me, Doctor," complained the patient.

"What have you been eating?" asked the doctor.

"That's easy. I only eat pool balls."

"Pool balls?!" said the astonished doctor. "Maybe that's the trouble. What kind do you eat?"

"All kinds," replied the man, "Red ones for breakfast, yellow and orange ones for lunch, blue ones for afternoon snacks, and purple and black for dinner."

"I see the problem," said the doctor. "You haven't been getting any greens!"

Computers Made Easy
for Senior Citizens

A priest, a rabbi, a nun, a lawyer, and a blonde walk into a bar.

The bartender looks up and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Ronald McDonald

A Scotsman named Ronald McDonald says he will sue McDonald's if they don't change the name of their clown. He wrote a letter to McDonald's, saying quote, "I wish to register a complaint about my name being commandeered by a clown. The prefix Mc and the name McDonald have been used in Scotland many centuries before your firm was ever in existence. Your name is an insult to millions of Scots."

... His brothers Bozo and Zippy had no comment...

FamilyPoint

"What's the date today?" asks a blonde.

"I don't know. You've got a newspaper in your hands... why don't you look at it?"

"That wouldn't do any good, it's yesterday's paper."

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"Son, when I was your age, I used to be thrilled just to get a piece of dry bread for dinner." "Gee, Dad, you're much better off living with us, aren't you??"

In My Younger Days

A priest was walking along the corridor of the parochial school near the preschool wing when a group of little ones were trotting by on the way to the cafeteria. One little lad of about three or four stopped and looked at him in his clerical clothes and asked, "Why do you dress funny?"

He told him he was a priest and this is the uniform priests wear. Then the boy pointed to the priest's collar tab and asked, "Do you have an owie?"

The priest was perplexed till he realized that to him the collar tab looked like a band aid.

So the priest took it out and handed it to the boy to show him.

On the back of the tab are letters giving the name of the manufacturer. The little guy felt the letters, and the priest asked, "Do you know what those words say?"

"Yes, I do," said the lad who was not old enough to read.

Peering intently at the letters he said, "Kills ticks and fleas up to six months!"

THE GENTLEMAN BURGLAR

The area had been hit with an epidemic of robberies perpetrated by the notorious gentleman burglar. One night Sadie woke and shook Hymie. "Hy, there's a burglar in the house," she said.

"There is not," He said sleepily. "Go back to sleep, stupid."

Just then a man sprang from inside a closet. "There is too," he declared.
"Now apologize to the lady."

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Q: Why do blondes leave empty milk cartons in the fridge?

A: In case someone wants black coffee.

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Stupid TIPS

Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a garment always circle the stain in permanent pen so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain and check that it has gone.

High blood pressure sufferers. Simply cut yourself and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.

Olympic athletes. Conceal the fact that you have taken performance enhancing drugs by simply running a little slower and letting someone else win.

Heavy smokers. Don't throw away those filters from the end of your cigarettes. Save them up and within a few years you'll have enough to insulate your loft.

Create instant designer stubble by sucking a magnet and dipping your chin in a bowl of iron fillings.

X File fans. Create the effect of being abducted be aliens by drinking two bottles of vodka. You'll invariably wake up in a strange place the following morning, having had your memory mysteriously 'erased'.

A sheet of sandpaper makes a cheap and effective substitute for costly maps when visiting the Sahara desert.

Convince neighbours that you have invented a 'SHRINKING' device by ruffling your hair, wearing a white laboratory coats and parking a JCB digger outside your house for a few days. Then dim and flicker the lights in your house during the night and replace the JCB unseen, with a Tonka toy of the same description. Watch their faces in the morning!

Go to the bathroom at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.

Nissan Micra drivers. Attach a lighted sparkler to the roof of your car before starting a long journey. You drive the things like dodgem cars anyway, so it may as well look like one.

Tape a chocolate bar to the outside of your microwave. If the chocolate melts you will know that the microwaves are escaping and it is time to have he oven serviced.

A mouse trap, placed on top on of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep.

Homemade Taffy

I lectured my son on the real values of life.   I said, "We were put on Earth to help others." The boy said, "What are the others here for?"

Advice From The Rabbi

A rather distraught young man goes to see his Rabbi. "Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it." The Rabbi asked, "What's wrong?"

The man replied, "My wife is poisoning me."

The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, "How can that be?"

The man then pleads, "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me, what should I do?"

The Rabbi then offers, "Tell you what. Let me talk to her, I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know."

A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, "Well, I spoke to your wife. I spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?"

The man anxiously says, "Yes."

"Take the poison," says the Rabbi.

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You know I bet Jesus had a lot of trouble buying his father a Father's Day gift. What can you buy somebody who has everything!

iBaby.com

A golfer who was known for his bad temper walked into the pro shop one day and plunked down big bucks for a new set of Woods.

The staff all watched to see what would happen after he used them for the first time - more than half expecting he'd come in and demand his money back.

But the next time he came in, he was all smiles.

"They're the best clubs I've ever had," he said. "In fact, I've discovered I can throw them at least 40 yards farther than I could my last ones."