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Special Moments Guide Service Home Page
Hi everyone ,
I want to thank all of you for the fantastic response to my request for more mail! I have received over 1,000 since then. KEEP IT UP!! It is going to take me a few issues to use everything that I received. Please keep sending email to: othrrggrs@aol.com remember to put KEEP SMILING in the subject line.
I need more photos of Clowns .....
Also I am looking for the real MR. and MRS. Santa Claus.... do you have pictures?
I would like photos of you as court jesters, jugglers, stiltwalkers, wizards,baton twillers, parade characters, magicians, mimes. If you perform to make people KEEP SMILING please donate your pictures. (please include your character name)
If you need the address for Keep Smiling to your pictures by snail mail please request it.
Get the idea? please send them to othrrggrs@aol.com Please be sure to put KEEP SMILING - PICTURES in the subject line.
There are some really cool links and jokes in this issue thanks to all the people that sent e-mail. Please take your time to enjoy them all.
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Smiling is the beginning to enlightenment
-An Indian Clown-
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Dining Out
One night, three couples went out to dinner together. While sitting at the table, the first husband turned to his wife and asked, "Please pass the honey, honey." Flattered, the first wife handed her husband the honey.
Shortly after, the second husband turned to his wife and asked, "Could you please pass the sugar, sugar?" Even more flattered, the second wife handed her husband the sugar.
Now the first two couples are looking at the third couple. The third husband looked to his wife and asked, "Could you please pass the tea, bag?"
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As a fireman, although now-a-days its firefighters argh-argh, we have one problem. It seems that when we use our dalmations for locating fire hydrants, they seem very protective of them, and at times we must wait in line!!!!
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The Disaster
"Oh, No!" I gasped as I surveyed the disaster before me. Never in my 50 years of life had I seen anything like it. How anyone could have survived I did not know. I could only hope that somewhere amid the overwhelming destruction I would find my 13-year-old daughter.
Only the slim hope of finding Kaitie kept me from turning and fleeing the scene. I took a deep breath and proceeded. Walking was virtually impossible with so many things strewn across my path. I moved ahead slowly.
"Kaitie ! Kaitie !" I whispered to myself. I tripped and almost fell several times. I heard someone, or something, move. At least I thought I did.
Perhaps, I was just hoping I did. I shook my head and felt my gut tighten. I couldn't understand how this could have happened.
There was some light but not enough to see very much. Something cold and wet brushed against my hand. I jerked it away. In desperation, I took another step then cried out, " KAITIE !"
From a nearby pile of unidentified material, I heard my daughter."Yes, Dad," she said, in a voice so weak I could hardly hear her.
"It's time to get up and get ready for school," I sighed, "and, for heaven's sake, clean up this room."
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Welcome to Cricket and Phoebe's World
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A GUY GOES INTO THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
HE'S GOT A CUCUMBER STICKING OUT OF HIS NOSE
HE'S GOT A BANANA STUCK IN ONE EAR AND A CARROT STICKING OUT OF THE OTHER EAR
THE MAN WAS ALL EXCITED -
"DOCTOR, DOCTOR, WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME !!"
THE DOCTOR LOOKED AT HIM FOR A MOMENT AND SAID "WELL, THE FIRST THING IS, YOU'RE NOT EATING PROPERLY"
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| Blackjack chewing gum
Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water Candy cigarettes Soda pop machines that dispensed bottles Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers Party lines Newsreels before the movie P.F. Flyers Butch wax Telephone numbers with a word prefix (Olive - 6933) Peashooters
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Howdy Doody 45 RPM records S&H Green Stamps Hi-fi's Metal ice trays with levers Mimeograph paper Blue flashbulbs Beanie and Cecil Roller skate keys Cork popguns Drive-ins Studebakers Wash tub wringers |
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SpeedyClick.com is the best site on the Web for fun interactive games and contests!!
Have fun, play contests and games for chances to WIN money and prizes.
Even register for a chance to win $10,000
Best of all -- All of the contests are free!!
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Eves' Place |
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In a deck of paying cards each king supposedly represents a great king or emperor from our history.
King David - Spades , Alexander the Great - Clubs,
Charlemagne - Hearts, Julius Caesar - Diamonds.
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Angelsinger's Page/Gloria's Heart
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We yell for the Government to balance the budget, then take the last dime we have to make the down payment on a car that will take 5 years to pay off.
We demand speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won't buy a car if it can't go over 100 miles an hour.
We know the line-up of every baseball team in the American and National Leagues but mumble through half the words in the "Star Spangled Banner."
We'll spend half a day looking for vitamin pills to make us live longer, then drive 90 miles an hour on slick pavement to make up for lost time.
We tie up our dog while letting our sixteen year old son run wild.
We whip any enemy in battle, then give them the shirt off our backs.
We get upset we're spending over a billion dollars for education, but spend three billion dollars a year for cigarettes.
In the office we talk about baseball, shopping or fishing, but when we are out at the game, the mall or on the lake, we talk about business.
We're supposed to be the most civilized Christian nation on earth, but we still can't deliver payrolls without an armored car.
We have more experts on marriage than any other country in the world and still have more divorces.
We're the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the world and more diets to keep us from eating it.
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In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Montana Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the field. We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle bears that aren't expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity.
Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear droppings. Black bear droppings is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear droppings has little bells in it and smells like pepper.
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If you could count the number of times a cricket chirps in one minute, divide by 2, add 9 and divide by 2 again, you would have the correct temperature in celcius degrees...On the other hand you can always look at a thermometer.
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"The Big Sale"
It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store's opening time, in front of the store.
A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown to the end of the line again.
As he got up the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line...
"That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won't open the store!"
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ATTITUDE
I woke up early today, excited over all I get to do before the clock strikes midnight.
I have responsibilities to fulfill today.
I am important.
My job is to choose what kind of day I am going to have.
Today I can complain because the weather is rainy or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free.
Today I can feel sad that I don't have more money or I can be glad that my finances encourage me to plan my purchases wisely and guide me away from waste.
Today I can grumble about my health or I can rejoice that I am alive.
Today I can lament over all that my parents didn't give me when I was growing up or I can feel grateful that they allowed me to be born.
Today I can cry because roses have thorns or I can celebrate that thorns have roses.
Today I can mourn my lack of friends or I can excitedly embark upon a quest to discover new relationships.
Today I can whine because I have to go to work or I can shout for joy because I have a job to do.
Today I can complain because I have to go to school or eagerly open my mind and fill it with rich new tidbits of knowledge.
Today I can murmur dejectedly because I have to do housework or I can feel honored because God has provided shelter for my mind, body and soul.
Today stretches ahead of me, waiting to be shaped.
And here I am, the sculptor who gets to do the shaping.
What today will be like is up to me.
I get to choose what kind of day I will have!
Have a great day...unless you have other plans.
- Unknown
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Check out this Fantastic service..it is well worth the look!
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A preacher visits an elderly woman from his congregation.
As he sits on the couch he notices a large bowl of peanuts on the coffee table. "Mind if I have a few" he asks.
"No, not at all" the woman replied.
They chat for an hour and as the preacher stands to leave, he realizes that instead of eating just a few peanuts, he emptied most of the bowl.
"I'm terribly sorry for eating all your peanuts, I really just meant to eat a few."
"Oh that's all right" the woman says. "Ever since I lost my teeth all I can do is suck the chocolate off them."
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$12 of FREE STUFF: energy bars, body care
products, nutritional supplements and more from healthshop
Visit and enter the coupon code HEAT to
receive your instant discount!
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Here is a game for you ...I think you will like it! You will have to download it and run it from your computer . This Yahtzee game has many features
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Playing With Grandpa
A sister and brother are talking to each other when the little boy gets up and walks over to his Grandpa and says, "Grandpa, please make a frog noise."
The Grandpa says, "No."
The little boy goes on, "Please .. please make a frog noise."
The Grandpa says, "No, now go play."
The little boy then says to his sister, "Go tell Grandpa to make a frog noise." So the little girl goes to her Grandpa and says, "Please make a frog noise."
The Grandpa says, "I just told your brother no and I'm telling you no."
The little girl says, "Please .. please Grandpa make a frog noise."
The Grandpa says, "Why do you want me to make a frog noise?"
The little girl replied, "Because mommy said when you croak we can go to Disney world
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